Recently a very special client asked me to write about my life transformation (as I have in my sister Laurel's blog). I am a bit hesitant to once again share this information publicly ... and yet I know how much I have learned by reading about the challenging experiences others have lived. It has always reassured me to know - "I am not alone." With this in mind I have decided to go ahead and begin to share "my story."
About twenty five years ago I was not only younger but my life had absolutely no resemblance to what it is today ... and for this I am eternally grateful.
I was 60 pounds heavier. I was very unhappy in my marriage. I drank alcohol every day to numb my emotional pain. The only light in my life, at that time, was my beautiful daughter. At first it was for her that I made my changes.
There was no special moment, no grand event that brought me to my knees and my senses causing me to realize that I needed to make some drastic changes. For the most part it was this simple: I no longer liked myself and I did not want my life to be a model for my daughter.
Here are the first important things I focused on, and did, to create radical change in my life.
I faced the truth that I was addicted to alcohol and talked with my doctor. I went to counseling for 9 months. I joined a gym (weighing 200 pounds) and began to exercise regularly for the first time in my life. I got involved at my daughter's school and volunteered my time. Key point in creating life change: I got help from others!!
After a year of "enduring" all of the above, I came to love all of the above - and myself.
Now I was ready for more truths. After additional therapy (couple's and private) along with much soul searching I ended my marriage. It was hard because I had promised myself that my daughter would not come from a divorced, broken home. At that time I didn't realize that a home can be broken even when the parents are not divorced, ours was.
I eventually went back to school online and became a Consulting Hypnotist with a doctoral degree in Clinical Hypnotherapy. I worked part time. I fell in love with the love of my life.
I wish I could say that since those changes my life has been a walk in the park ... but that would not be true. I still experience many ups and downs and difficult times. The difference is I have learned to be true to myself (no more self-betrayal), to get up when I fall down, to ask for help, and to trust myself. Change is constant and that's okay!
Most important of all is that I am still learning that it is okay to listen to your heart, to go after what you want, and to change your mind when you know you have made a mistake.